Brought to you by TheJudge13 contributor Mattpt55 – the best in Scrutineering, Stewards’ Decisions, and other assorted FIA documents looked at slightly irreverently
There’s the race we see on telly, and then there’s the race behind the scenes. One rarely talked about by reporters but told in part by the official FIA documents. Here is a selection of this weekend’s documents for you to peruse at your leisure. Enjoy. Wonder where all this great stuff came from? Right Here
From the Dept of I Think You Forgot
What, no paving of gravel traps? Not that I’m complaining
From the Dept of Keeping Score
Place your bets now for next grid penalty, before it’s too late
From the Dept of Arctic Animals
Pretty sure breaking a seal will earn you a PETA protest.
From the Dept of Too Bad
Guess that was before the FIA realized Steven’s paperwork wasn’t going to make it
From the Dept of There You Go
And no more Stevens. Never overlook the power of properly filed paperwork.
From the Dept of Power to the People
Kamui gets it. Why can’t Bernie?
From the Dept of Wha?
Well, I guess we know now which way your career is going.
From the Dept of Don’t SugarCoat It
Romain’s season has been fine. His car and engine, not so much.
From the Dept of What Aren’t You Telling Us
You sneaky little…… I bet you already knew
From the Dept of Turns Out There are Stupid Questions
No driver in their right mind would turn down an offer from Ferrari. Would You?
From the Dept of How did He Manage To Keep a Straight Face
No, seriously. Can you imagine what he was thinking when they asked this question?
From the Dept of RoGro Wins Again
His Mom’s Subaru. On a Track. Best Answer Ever.
From the Dept of Lack of Naughtiness
From the Dept of Ooops
That sounds ominous
From the Dept of Look at That
The amazing thing is there are some Renaults on that list that haven’t used all their lives up yet.
From the Dept of Rules are Rules
And then there’s Ferrari rules. But it’s OK, Sky says it’s allowed
From the Dept of Trio’s
That’s probably the last time Kobayashi will see his name with Vettel and Ricciardo. No champers though.
From the Dept of High Prices
Steep Price for a New Gearbox
From the Dept of Google Translate
I may not be a PR pro, but I’m pretty sure you don’t want to admit you don’t have an actual plan.
From the Dept of Crystal Balls
Set Calendars for January
From the Dept of Thaw
So Mercedes is worried about what it will cost, Ferarri doesn’t care what it will cost and Renault just doesn’t care. Insert appropriate national sterotype jokes here.
From the Dept of NickNames
I liked my nickname better
From the Dept of ZOMG
If you only knew how close you were
From the Dept of Finally Some Facts
Rob Marshall, Dan Fallows, Pierre Wache and Paul Monaghan will be taking the place of Adrian Newey. Wonder if that’s enough?
From the Dept of Maths
From the Dept of More ICE please
Still early on a Saturday
From the Dept of Uh-Oh
Oh dear, that sounds bad
From the Dept of Some of These Things are Exactly Like the Others
And this week they match
From the Dept of Great Days
Translated: I beat Lewis Whoo Hooo!!!
From the Dept of No Excuses
Nice work on the rebuild.
From the Dept of Ummm… What?
So you’re a lot less way slower. OK, think I got that
From the Dept of Weak Foundations
Oh, relying on the FIA. Always dubious.
From the Dept of Insults and Injuries
This would be both
From the Dept of I’ll put something here if the Lazy-Ass FIA ever gets around to publishing it before the race
Thanks Carlo for helping out with the new look!